5 Sex Goals For 2018! - New Year, New Sex Life Class Day 1/7


Happy New Year !

You all I am seriously dumbfounded that 2018 is here! 

How did 2017 treat you? 

I can say that I learned some beautiful and really challenging lessons in 2017 when it comes to love but I am sincerely forever grateful for every twist and turn that got me to this point.

We also did something spectacular our film "Sex Is A God Thing" reached 10 million views between all social media sites.  We are in the first phase of production for the webseries. I can't wait to continue sharing more with you all about this epic journey. 

Every new year roles around and we set some intentions and some goals that seem realistic but also a bit of a stretch so we can grow.  As I look over folks posts and emails about their goals for this year what I see a lack of are pleasure centered goals.

I'm all here for the new year, new you mentality if that helps you. For those of us who aren't so keen on this feeling of reinvention for the new year why don't we try something else shall we? 

How about instead of focusing on all the things that you're going to cut out this year to get to xyz goal why not explore the types of pleasure that you want to bring into your intimate life? 

At the beginning of 2018 I started a little venture with myself and some pals called #hoenanigans you can read the post on it here. Some days after I wrote the post I started creating a pleasure bucket list

Here were some of the things that I had on my bucket list!

  • Wear shorts and short skirts. Not hiding behind big dresses unless I feel like it.  - DID IT! 

  • Build up my yoni egg collection 

  • dye my hair purple or rainbow  - DID IT! 

  • Uber of no-shame at least once.  - DID IT! x a few ;)

  • Make an epic ass twerk video with some friends  - DID IT! 

  • Buy a strap for myself 

  • Dinner date and sex or maybe just sex on the penthouse level of a hotel overlooking an incredible view

  • Sex in the rain.  

  • Sky diving 

  • Get a crew of girls together to cheer for all an all stud sweaty ass basketball game. 

  • Learn to jump double dutch

  • Master at least two pole inversions and climb to the top 

  • Photoshoot in a Brazilian bikini on the beach 

  • Curve at least one person permanently and not regret it later  - Did it!

  • Get my belly button pierced 

  • Full sleeve  - GETTING CLOSE! 

  • Go somewhere hott with my girls and act a fool for a few days. : - IN THE WORKS!

I realized that with each act I was reawakening my Inner Temptress - my IT FACTOR. I was drawing life to me by being open and present vs. fighting it every step of the way.

Awakening my Inner Temptress daily is a declaration to not live on empty and put myself first. It's about investigating my desires relentlessly and being active in this thing called life. 

So what things have you been craving to explore that you really haven't tackled yet? 


5 Sex Goals For 2018

#1. Explore Self-Pleasure More Often

Taking ownership over your body and your sex life means giving up this idea that some else holds the keys to you accessing pleasure or orgasm.  This year make time and space to explore your self-pleasure practice and not just because you're single or your partner isn't in the mood. Do it because it feels good to bring that energy back into your body, to explore new things you never knew you liked

eg : wearing nipple clamps while you stroke your clitoris or playing with anal beads solo

#2 Get dressed up more often

I know you're probably like what the hell does dressing up have to do with anything? Hear me out. I've been doing some research on myself and with my clients and what I've noticed is that when we focus energy and attention to detail on how we want to curate our expression of style we radiate at a different frequency. These last two months I've been playng around with doing my own natural hair in classic curls. Oddly enough it's a style that my Mom use to do to my hair as a young girl and I HATED IT because everyone said I looked like a wanna-be-Oprah. The worst. Today, hell I be pretend Oprah all day long and I feel fabulous. 


#3 Plan A Sex Night - With your Love or Solo

We all have ridiculously busy schedules amiright? Sometimes making time let alone being in the mood for sex is just not in the cards. Pre-planning nights where you and your partner will consciously plan and shift gears into Romance/Reconnection mode may help you clear up that drought! Here's why most folks won't do it  : because sex and connection is not a high priority. Even if you and your partner are having some communication issues within the relationship talking with one another about the desire to connect and then making the space to show up for each other (even if sex doesn't happen) will demonstrate that you have made your sex life important again. You'll want to see tip #4 if you've been in a rut for awhile and don't actually know where to begin. 



Have you ever had your nipples sucked or stimulated until you reached climax without being touched anywhere else? Whether you answered yes or no just think about how amazing that feels to your body and remind yourself to slow down when it's time to engage. Another helpful pointer is to engage in foreplay constantly. I know that sounds exhausting and demanding but I promise you the key is in keeping it simple. Sometimes it might be getting up with your partner before they are off to work so you can have a cup of coffee together. Sending a message saying that you're thinking of them. Building your lingerie closet. Slipping into the shower together. Cooking by candlelight. Kissing for 20 minutes and then breaking away. The point is to constantly refuel the engine of intimacy by finding small ways to stay connected to each other. 


#5 Ask For What You Want! 


Sex is just as much about your pleasure as it yours. Asking your partner to slow down, speed up or change positions or to touch you a certain way all demonstrate that you are active in your sex life and not sitting passive. I know it takes some know courage to start speaking up but I encourage you to start with the first tip so you can better understand your personal needs which will give you motivation to ask for the thing. 

Want to learn more about awakening your inner temptress & unleashing jaw dropping confidence in the bedroom and life? Sign up for the The Temptress Newsletter community to receive my free ebook "Bring Your Lover To Their Knees"! 

To Love + Wildness,