How To Stop Overgiving & Undercharging in Your Service Based Business.


Picture by Miller. Love My Oversized Sunhats. Raise your prices. 3x.

Women business owners.

I’m talking to you.

Why, you ask?

I want you to price yourself so you can REST + PLAY. Not just work more.


This screenshot is the cost of my spouse and I having insurance on our own. We don’t work for anyone right now, it’s just us. This is the reality of being a small business owner. Please know that  I’m not complaining. We have made and continue to make our choices so that we are in alignment with the lifestyle we desire. This isn’t a “reAl HuStlErS dOn’T cLoCk iN” bullshit rant. I’m here for somebody else picking up the tab OKAY? But not at the expense of our wellbeing or sanity. We’ve had some interesting (to say the least) experiences navigating Corporate America that we’ll be taking about in Season II of our podcast Queer + Married (Available on all steaming platforms).

THIS RIGHT HERE BABY IS A WHOLE MORTGAGE and a reality check for all my small business owners. I remember when my only goal was to be able to make “just enough”. I had to break myself of the “just enough” curse. I had to break myself of this mentality that there isn’t enough. I had to break myself of the idea that I owed other people something and if I didn’t make it available then I was a bad person. I’m sure one of you reading this is nodding your head and saying “I want more too. I’m tired of working so hard.”

If you’re questioning whether there are actually enough resources take a look at this Neilson Report on the power of the Black Dollar.


We have to understand that money is a tool and it’s time for us to go get some of this wealth. If we get unapologetic about our business, we can give back and build in our communities in greater ways.

But often times I find people doing the reverse. Giving, giving and giving most of the time for free or at such low cost that when the work is done there is NO SPACE to breathe because you have to start all over again. And while this may seem normal in a traditional work setting, it is a quick route to sabotage in business.

In business you are the equivalent of three-six part time people and half of them hate their boss (you) and always want to quit. Lol, y’all know I’m telling the truth. You’re the talent, the marketer, the sales person, the janitor and the list goes on. If you’re a parent or caretaker then add that to your task list after your work day ends (when does it ever end you say right?). You can’t get around that working on your own. And while you do phenomenal work, you are not a machine. You need time to be able to reset and recharge before you give again. Too many of us are pricing ourselves like somebody else is picking up the expenses. (And even if you do have a sponsor price yourself like you don’t.)

Miller and I have a dream of buying up property throughout the South Side of Chicago to stabilize rent. As the Obama Foundation begins to move forward and break ground, rent is rising and there is an increasing presence of gentrifiers coming into these communities. They have little to no regard for the damage their presence and desire to be on “the budding south side” is doing. I’m not even in the space to ask people to care anymore. I’m ready for us to buy the whole block.


So what do I really mean when I say raise your prices:

I means play a much bigger game with money.

I mean don’t just think about your own salary but how you can provide a sustainable living for yourself and 10 other staff members.

It means hiring support now and not just when it feels safe.

It means trusting yourself and Life in ways that you haven’t.

It means showing up and out consistently.

It means not talking yourself out of increase.

It means reserving your energy.

It means being of service strategically in ways that are sustainable and have a ripple effect vs. one off donations of (time,money,resources) that don’t have a long life cycle.

It means changing the way you work.

Last year I decided I wasn’t going on tour again until my publisher was paying for it as we announced my #1 New York Times Best Selling Book. #Igotdreamsyall.

It means prioritizing your family over more hours working.

I took heed from the other women around me telling me to slow down. I listened to my heart as I was craving to soak up all this newlywed time. I listened to my body as my desire to be a mother grew. I knew that if I were to start preparing for pregnancy I needed to make some drastic shifts in my work life and my health. I launched my mastermind with our first Retreat in San Rafael,California 2019 and the response was so affirming. I never would have known had I not stepped far outside of my comfort zone.


My business is not in the same place that it use to be. I’m not the fresh eyed hopeful college student selling $5 Afro-Samba classes anymore. But I know I want to make that girl’s hustle worth it by honoring the groundwork that she layed 10+ years ago. I want to become a womxn that can not only help herself but help others in a sustainable and life giving way for everyone.

So this long Memorial Day weekend I want you to think about your vision. Twenty years from now what do you crave for your life? For your family? For your community? What do you want to see different?

After you ask yourself this then I want you to be honest with yourself about what needs to change TODAY.

In reverence to your sexy,


Ready to play a bigger game?

Join me for my 2019-2020 mastermind: UNLEASHED. A year long personal transformation experience designed to help ambitious women cultivate rest, pleasure and decadence.

Uplevel the way you care for yourself.

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